FROM MIDNIGHT TONIGHT Irish taxis must be fitted with right and left hand indicators. The device, which is already mandatory in other public and private motor vehicles, has been under going trials at several urban centres.  “It’s not fair on our…

MINISTER FOR AGRICULTURE, Food and the Marine Simon Coveney has called on Irish farmers to plant rice instead of other crops to take advantage of the latest floods sweeping Ireland.  “This is a great opportunity for the nation’s farmers. We now…

LOUTH COUNTY COUNCIL is under fire following the unveiling of its new urban street bins. The new bins have been described as paltry and mean by both environmentalists and locals alike. “The old ones were bad enough, you could hardly fit…

EMBATTLED IRISH FINANCIER, David Drumm, has launched a random lotto picker for people who play the Irish Lottery. The new enterprise is said to be the culmination of Mr Drumm’s entire working career, based on his vast experience of financial services…

DUNDALK SCHOOL TEACHER, Maurice O’Hanlon, was stunned when schoolboy Jason McEnuff claimed hackers ate his homework. Jason, who is a pupil at the De La Salle secondary school in Dundalk, made the claim during English class on Friday last. “I was just…

THE WAR ON DRUGS may just have become unwinnable following the news that a team of geneticists at Monsanto Corporation labs in St. Louis, Missouri, has successfully cross bred a cannabis plant with the common nettle. It’s understood that the Monsanto team has succeeded in swapping the…